


Pink Thing

by elixia13



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Bad Fic, Humor, M/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-28
Updated: 2010-01-28
Packaged: 2017-10-06 18:56:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/56769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elixia13/pseuds/elixia13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Skinner tells Mulder how *deep* his feeling are with the help of a certain song.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pink Thing

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a really silly idea that occured to me. Some songfic is good, some is bad. This is really, really bad.

Fox was sitting on the couch in the Crystal City apartment he shared with Walter. Walter was his boss by day, his lover by night, but Fox was beginning to doubt that Walter really loved him. He seemed distant. Was it just sex? Was he, Fox, no good in bed? Fox was really upset about this, and he sat on the couch with his head in his hands looking very angsty.

Just then Walter came out of the bedroom he shared with Fox. Walter was happy because he had just been on the phone making plans for their second bedroom to be turned into a dungeon with shackles on the floor and everything. Fox was scared of being tied down, but that made Walter very arroused. It made Fox very arroused too, even though he didn't say so.

Walter looked over at the couch then and saw Fox looking angsty. "What's wrong, honey?" Walter was concerned, and he kneeled down in front of Fox. "Talk to me. Foxxy," said Walter.

Fox looked up at Walter then. "Do you really love me?" Fox asked this with a really cute little pout on his face. He was insecure, but that arroused Walter even more. Walter didn't know how to tell Fox how he felt. He was an ex-Marine, and so he was the strong, silent type. He liked to ream Fox out in the office, but he had trouble with nice things like love.

Lucky for Walter, a song came on the radio just then. It was an old song by XTC. Walter was saved. Walter didn't have an eidetic memory like Fox, but he could still remember songs. Taking Fox's chin in his large, rough hand, Walter began to sing.

"Anytime you rise, I'm here, and I'm crazy for you pink thing. You make me want to laugh, you make me want to cry. When I stroke your head I feel a hundred heartbeats high."

Fox wondered which head Walter meant, but he was still feeling kind of angsty. Walter kept singing.

"I want to take you out and show you round the world, Pink thing it'll be okay. If only I could wake you from your slumber curled, Pink thing what would straight folks say?"

Fox knew this song too, with his eidetic memory, and he started singing the next part.

"That man isn't fit to enter heaven, That man is a sinner. Ever burning in disgrace."

This made Walter upset for Fox, so he sung back to Fox,

"Pink thing, spit in my face. I'd love you for it."

Fox thought that was sort of gross, but cute too. Walter, of course, was getting more and more arroused. His pink thing was starting to wake from it's slumber curled, alright. He thought he should try harder to convince Fox how he felt, so he started singing again.

"Anytime you call, I'll fall into madness for you pink thing. You make we want to live, you make me want to die, And when I stroke your head I feel a hundred heart beats high."

To prove his point, Walter stroked the growing bulge in Fox's pants. Fox had leaned back by now, or Walter would have had a hard time reaching it. Walter kept singing. even though his voice sounded kind of funny.

"I want to take you out and show you to the girls. Pink thing they're a whole new tribe. If you could only see the way the gingham swirls, Pink thing it's a whole new vibe."

This part was sort of confusing to Fox. He and Walter didn't like girls. They liked boys, I mean men. Scully was a girl, but she didn't wear gingham. Anyway, he was still feeling angsty, so he sang moodily,

"That man isn't fit to be a father, that man is a sinner. 'Fore they cast me down to die."

Walter had enough with this angst. He had to convince Fox.

"Pink thing, spit in my eye, I'd love you for it. Yes, I'd love you for it. Anytime you rise, I'm here, and I'm crazy for you pink thing. You make me want to laugh, you make me want to cry. When I stroke your head I feel a hundred heartbeats high."

While Andy Partiridge sang this again, Walter pulled Fox to his feet. (That's Andy Partridge, an English guy with glasses, not Danny Patridge, the little red haired boy from TV. They're different. Andy is cute, but probably gay, like Fox and Walter. That's okay.)

Anyway, The music got faster then, and Walter started shaking Fox's shoulders to the tune of the music. He was trying to shake some sense into him probably.

"I want to introduce you, take you to the bring thing. I want to introduce you, tell me what you think thing. I want to introduce you, make that missing link thing. Don't you think it's time you met some female pink thing?"

Hmm, thought Fox, maybe Walter did like girls as well as men. This was kind of weird, but at least Fox was pretty sure Walter did like him. And that he wasn't bad at sex.

Walter could tell that Fox finally understood, which was good because Walter was tired. Walter plopped down on the couch, pulling Fox with him. He quietly finished up the song.

"You make me want to laugh. You make me want to cry. So why is it I'm happy when there's tears down in your eye? Little pink thing."

Walter looked at Fox, who was smiling now and not angsty. He said, "You're my little pink thing." Fox thought that this was a kind of dirty song. Maybe he should get the CD for Walter's birthday. But then Walter decided that they could have lots of fun in the bedroom with Mulder's pink thing, even if they didn't have a dungeon yet.

The End.


End file.
